I Tried an 8-Step $400 Luxury Skin Care Routine for My Vagina

Not long ago, most people’s skin care routine consisted of a quick wash, maybe a weekly exfoliant, and some moisturizer. To 2018 eyes, this routine seems minimalist, even monklike in its simplicity. At worst, it seems downright deprived—wherefore art thou, serums, oils, masks, and muds?

It’s no news that these days, skin care is kind of a big deal. The category is outpacing sales more than any other in the beauty space. But now that even your most low-maintenance girlfriend is posting sheet-mask selfies, we’ve obviously reached a tipping point, right?

Not even close. The newest frontier in skin care is all about your vagina. Okay, more accurately, it’s about your vulva. But either way, there are a surprisingly large number of brands springing up to offer your ladyparts a luxury, multi-step skin care experience with products that promise to cleanse, nourish, and exfoliate your skin, soften your pubes, make your shave or wax easier and less painful, and even highlight your vulva to catch that good light. (Why should your cheekbones have all the fun?)

In the name of science, I tried the buzziest products for a week. I figured it’d be fun and funny. I didn’t expect to become a true believer in some of this stuff. Read on for the true story of how I got the bougiest vadge in Brooklyn.

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